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January 17, 2007

Man, I’m a bit depressed. I spent quite a bit of time on a post about modesty, and due to some odd occurrance beyond my control, the entire entry decided to delete itself. Here is a new post, re-written, but hopefully like the original.

If you’re reading this blog, you’re probably into the blog scene enough to know about this already. However, in case you aren’t, here’s the information on an exciting thing over at The Rebelution (Alex and Brett Harris, Josh’s little brothers). They had girls e-mail them questions about modesty, and boiled them down to about 150 questions. Guys, now it’s your turn. Go to: The Rebelution.  Sign up for the survey, and then answer the questions (there are a lot, so it may take more than one sitting). Girls, as of now you can view the questions, or you could just wait till the results come out. I think this could be a great resource for girls to understand how modesty works from a guy’s prespective.

Speaking of modesty, in a weird coincidence (or sovereignly appointed event, to be more precise) my sister Kiera and I were talking about what character traits attract us to the opposite sex. As a sidenote, I love talking to my sister. I thank God (or, really, should) more often thank Him) for giving me such a great sister. We talk about anything–from the serious to the hilarious. I always come away from talking to her refreshed and envigorated to live for Christ, no matter what we’re talking about.

As I thought about the question of what character traits attract me to girls, the issue of modesty kept coming up in my mind. This may seem an outward thing and not a character trait, but I think that it is a modest heart that inspires modest dress. It is not about “rules” of modesty–there is not a law that tells us “the tank top shall not be worn, nor shall the skirt be shorter than the knee.” Modesty should spring from the heart.

I respect modesty in girls so much, for multiple reasons. The first is because it reveals a heart that is considerate of others around them–namely, guys–and that they selflessly put others before themselves. A heart of modesty also requires a squelching of fear of man in a culture that says immodesty in girls is the norm. Additionally, it demonstrates a love for God and for their Christian brothers more than their own time, which they have to spend searching–sometimes unsuccessfully–for modest clothes that are still stylish and feminine. This is something I love about the girls who go to my church. They–without exception–all strive for modest dress that glorifies God and shows care for their brothers.

If you are one of my friends from church who is a girl (the chances of this are unlikely, I know, but still, it needs to be said), thank you so much for your kindness and consideration of your Christian brothers. Know that I respect you so highly for your selfless expression of love. You are an example to me of how to lay your life down in many ways for others.

I think I had some good, witty way of ending this entry, but I’ve forgotten, and it’s floating somewhere in cyberspace.



4 Comments leave one →
  1. January 18, 2007 9:42 pm

    I just stumbled onto your site from the Irish Calvinist blog. Great entry! I have never really thought about modesty being something done out of respect for the other sex. I have always just been of the mind that it is simply the person’s responsibility to keep their mind from unclean thoughts when confronted with this issue. Now, I see how we should be more active in helping our brother/sister to not sin. I really think that if more people were more modest, we would have many more relationships that actually lasted longer than the infatuation stage. People would start becoming attracted to someone whose personality was compatible with their own rather than just being led by lust then moving on when that wore off.

    Thank you for the insight.


  2. January 18, 2007 11:24 pm

    “People would start becoming attracted to someone whose personality was compatible with their own rather than just being led by lust then moving on when that wore off.”

    I really think that statement captures what’s going on in our society. Sex is being idolized, and people’s lust lead them from one relationship to the next (not realizing that it is their sin that is is problem, not the people in the relationships.)

    Thanks for your thoughts!


  3. January 20, 2007 9:52 am

    Good thoughts, my brother. You said it pretty well up there. I just want to reiterate that I also care about modesty in women. I am so grateful for those who take the time to dress in a way that helps me in my Christian walk. At the same time, this doesn’t excuse us guys from lusting. My pastor made a great point the other week – that we can be preoccupied as guys with what girls wear, thinking to ourselves “if we could only get the girls not to wear this, that, and this other thing, we wouldn’t struggle with lust!” This is not true. Lust is a problem within our hearts which must be dealt with anyway. We’d still find reasons to sin even if all the girls in the world dressed modestly. Also, we will never get every girl to dress modestly, so we also have to figure out how to deal with that.

  4. January 22, 2007 3:20 pm

    Another thing to think about is the fact that God created us with an attraction for the opposite sex, a part of which is physical attraction. It is not the attraction that is sin, it is what we do with those thoughts and where they lead that become the sin. As Brando said, we would still lust even if all girls dressed modestly. Ultimately, the responsibility lies with us to take those feelings and thoughts and make sure they don’t cause us to have unclean thoughts. At the same time, who are you most likely to look at while walking down the street, a girl in a low-cut blouse with tight jeans or a girl dressed in jeans that don’t hug and a sweater? Which one will you likely think about later, long after they have disappeared from sight? And finally, is it ok to “check out” a girl and appreciate her beauty as long as you don’t let those thoughts consume you and cause you to sin?

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