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Mawadge, Mawadge, is what brings us togevar today

August 20, 2007

I couldn’t resist the Princess Bride quote.  Absolutely love that movie.

Over the past few years, my views on whether or not I would get married have drastically changed.  I used to think of it as something nice, something to perhaps aspire to, but nothing to really be excited about.  This was especially the case in my college years and the first year or two of my working life.   The fact was that at that time, I never could quite picture myself as married.  I read the Apostle Paul talking about singleness, and thought “hey, that sounds like a pretty good life.  I could handle that.”  I believe this was God’s doing in me, to make me more effective in my ministry.  Indeed, I have taken on more time consuming ministries in the churches I have been a part of than would have been possible if I were married, and I really loved it.

However, over the past year or two, my perspective has really changed on this issue.  I have been finding that I now have a desire to get married.  It is as if a switch went off, and I went from someone content with singleness to someone who, as Paul describes in 1 Corinthians, “burns with passion”.   Again, I can find no other explaination than this is something that God is working in me, in order to get me thinking about marriage.  This has made me very attentive to how to pursue it, and I have been studying materials on marriage and relationships that I really would have had no interest in a few months ago.

So why the change?  What made me go from one extreme to the other?  I think, beside God’s working, it was the following factors:

1.  Hearing challenging teaching on marriage.  I have heard several teachers teach that there should be few singles – people should either be married, pursuing marriage, or feel called to be single.  While I do not think I agree with that view point, this has challenged me to re-evaluate if I should simply be content with this stage in my life.  Might God want me to get married?  I have been convinced that he does, although I do not know the timing.

2.  Seeing friends get married.  I’m at that age where a lot of people I know are getting hitched.  I’ve attended many weddings in the past 2 years, and this has showed me what a good gift God has given to people in marriage.  Seeing friends of mine get married has made it much more real than it had been before – I think I knew marriage was good intellectually, but seeing it worked out among friends has made it more real, and thus more desirable. Also, seeing how God has made them better through their marriages has also inspired me to think about marriage.  Seeing how a wife helps a husband, and how a husband helps a wife, makes me want the same thing for my life.

3.   Seeing friends become parents.  I have wanted to be a father myself for a while, but it wasn’t something I thought of enough to make me feel the imperative for marriage.  I work with kids on a regular basis anyway, so my desire to be around children has been met through that.  However, seeing how parenthood changes those I know has me wanting to be a father more than ever.  To be able to hold a baby and call him my son, or call her my daughter, would be an amazing experience which I have no category for now.

The long and the short of it is, I now feel called to marriage.  The only problem is I don’t have a clue who to pursue as a wife.  That should change over time, but for now, I’ll be working to trust God for his good timing.  The fact that I am struggling with this shows me that this desire has hit me more strongly than it ever had in the past.  Until God reveals a woman he wants me to pursue, I will continue to use my time to serve the church.  After all, I am still single, so there is no reason to mope around because I am not married, but instead use my singleness to serve the church, because that is the best way to glorify God through my single years.

One Comment leave one →
  1. September 5, 2007 9:13 pm

    It’s exciting to hear what God’s done in your life concerning marriage. I’m certain He has a purpose!–We’ll pray the Lord brings you a wife. He is an awesome provider of all good things! 🙂

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